update

I have misplaced my camera again somehow. At first I just thought it would show up, but, a week later, it has not. blerg.
I can however update any of those who wanna know how we've been with some drawn and rambly paragraphs;

Ema Francis is teething again, and it feels like she just has been for months and months now. But the teeth are showing so its not all for naught. Just this morning she stood herself up on the bed, and did a little leg bop! then fell, and repeat repeat. Then I brought her downstairs to the carpet and she has been repeating the process there all day. She also played a little game of 'drop the wooden cookies in the jar' by herself for like half an hour. Which is the first really intensive solitary play I've seen from her. She's definitely in the learning stage involved with filling a receptacle and then emptying it. She's a smart cookie. She yells a lot too. With all kinds of emotions; play, anger, distress, joy.... practicing her Underwood voice.
I've been calling her Francis lately. Maybe she will always be in between the two names, and yet also both. Maybe she is polarized and ambiguous, or maybe it means nothing. Maybe I am indecisive. I am in love with both names.

(Kevin Spacey's name in House of Cards is Francis Underwood. Funny)

Olive. She is.... just so much a kid. She plays all by herself, little games and scenarios I cannot decypher. Its fun to watch her. She can ride her bike all by herself all of a sudden. She tells herself the stories in her books,  though she cannot read the words. The thing she does that annoys me so much is constantly lugging toys back and forth from everywhere. She fills her pack-pack then carries a toy in each arm. She borrows toys from everyone, and she leaves all of these toys to pile up in my already brimming with junk car. And most of the time she insists that I be the one to carry these toys for her (once we are already out of the house, of course). Sigh. I've started to limit her to 2 toys, when I have the energy for a looooooong discussion of it. And lots of compromise as well.

Toys are very much a burden for me (and I suspect other parents too). I want a diverse set for the children to create whatever they want, and we really have a lot of great toys, but OH MY GOODNESS the influx is overwhelming. I feel that no matter what I do people we know (who obviously love us) are constantly giving us things. Politely decline you say? Well I would, that is if the toys weren't already placed into the hands of an excited 3 year old ready for a fight. Its just....

It doesn't feel like a gift if it makes our lives more stressful.

And believe me when I cannot see the carpet in my living room and the floor in my kitchen, and I trip over cars on my way to the bathroom, and I spend the entire day picking up just toys, its very stressful. When there are too many toys for my children to manage learning the pick-up. Its stressful. Perhaps there is no real solution. I just get rid of things as they annoy me. I know which toys are meaningful to Olive and hope she doesn't remember the ones in a box heading to the thrift.

How am I doing you ask? Pretty good. With Emy's birthday coming up I've been reflecting on the last year of my life as an intensive mama and thinking about what will be coming up for me as we gain independence form each other. She is still really attached to me and welcome there, but I know how fast she'll become a toddler and able to be away from me the way Olive is. I'm excited about that. What I might do with time alone. Possibilities...